We begin with Carrie and her motor-mouthed friend Susan on the eve or two of Carrie’s birthday. While oohing and aahing over cashmere that Carrie plans to exchange to pay the rent, Susan’s jerk of a husband kicks out Carrie and this spurs the tough spot many singles face: giving their opinion on someone else’s relationship.
The girls empathize with Carrie, and we also learn that Samantha is still pretending with James and Miranda is dating a guy who likes dirty sex talk. “Sex is not a time to chat” and I agree. A couple comments are fine here and there, but life is not a porno, and porno is not an accurate portrayal of life. There’s no need for commentary like we are on TV or something. But even Samantha is shocked when Charlotte admits to some sexual cheerleading using certain expletives.
This leads into Carrie’s theme du jour: are there things we shouldn’t say? It also shows us our last interview montage. These were fun at first, got a bit campy later on, and we will no longer see them again. This one is a decent farewell, however, and the segue is great as Susan tells the camera/Carrie that she left her dicky husband Richard, and the practically adores Carrie for telling her the awful truth.
Speaking of speaking up Miranda finally tests the sexy chit chat waters with some monosyllabic responses to her man’s verbose comments. She eventually warms up to some more expressive language with makes the guy feel even hotter.
Carrie and her squatter Susan spend some time with Charlotte and her new dog. She’s decided to replace men with a pet dog, hoping she can manipulate him more easily. The next day Carrie wakes up to a birthday surprise in the form of flowers at her door. She immediately calls an emergency session with the girls.
Charlotte comes up with something out of her big book of relationship bullshit called “the grand gesture”. Apparently, Big may want to get back with Carrie, and this is his first attempt. She has to leave, though, because her new pet is being uncooperative.
Carrie takes the opportunity to call Big and thank him for the flowers. Turns out it was kind of a mix up, and that his secretary already had the flowers pre-ordered, and they were more or less sent automatically. Carrie, embarassed, worsens her shame by inviting him out to her birthday soiree. Big says he’d love to and that he’s bringing someone. Uh oh.
Samantha and James are about to finish up their first and fruitless session with the couples’ therapist. Fearing further torture in this way, Samantha finally comes clean and calls out James’ tiny penis and the source of her unhappiness.
Yeah, it’s a bitchy thing to do. James can’t help it. It is a brave thing to do, though. Samantha isn’t doing James a favor by staying with him unhappily. There’s probably a woman out there who won’t mind a tiny package, and James will be happier with her than he will with Samantha.
Think what you want, but Samantha did the best thing she could have. Sometimes you have to suck it up (even if there’s not that much to suck) and be the “big” person and tell they truth of the matter.
Besides, even the therapist likes ’em big.
Miranda is also feeling liberated by speech. Dirty speech. Unfortunately mentioning the awful truth her man loves to be fingered violates his sacred heterosexuality and they split up. Miranda mentions this at Carrie’s b-day dinner where Big shows up with his “date”, his asshole friend Jack. Susan puts the moves on him, is rebuffed, and realizes that she misses her abusive husband. Carrie watches Moroccan women dance in Big’s face while suffering jibes from her friends about why she invited him.
Some women can’t let go of their exes.
As Charlotte returns home, her dog has successfully managed to shit on her life just like any real guy would, and so she promptly gets rid of the dog. He winds up with Susan and helps bring her and her husband back together. Happy ending?
Carrie ends on a mysterious ending after Big walks her home. They don’t kiss or anything, but Carrie must face an awful truth of her own: she’s not over Mr. Big.
While I like the theme of this episode, and it’s well implemented one too, the plot falters in some places. The whole dog story with Charlotte is a bit too silly and doesn’t really go anywhere except to provide a meaningless ending to Susan Sheridan’s brief estrangement from her husband. It’s not the last we see of her, but her marriage’s fate is never mentioned again anyway so what does it matter.
Still, it was good to see some plots from last season conclude or return, and from here on out silly-ness drops away (mostly) while we get more deeply involved with the girls’ lives instead of being constantly reminded that we are watching shock-comedy on HBO.